While You Were Away...

This post is for Dad because when he calls me from London, he usually asks about the house. He seems concerned that it's being trashed by either us or neighborhood vandals when we're not there.

You can't blame him, leaving your home for 6 months can be a little unsettling. So last time I was there, I decided to take some pictures. I apologize for the low quality, these were actually taken with my cell phone because I didn't have a real camera with me.

Here is the north side of the house. Doesn't look too bad...

Front porch...

Family Room/Kitchen area...

Living Room.

Mail Room. Junk mail is piling up...

Here's the fridge. Looks like you have some fry sauce from Arctic Circle waiting for you. I'm thinking that was Lisa. I'm going to say the yoplait is Kelly's. And I'm going to say the fountain drink is mine.

I can't guarantee this is how it will look when you get home. This is how it looked as of April 24.

Selections from Today's Phone Conversation with Grandma Durham

Gma: So what did you have for lunch?
Me: Great Harvest
Gma: I thought they just made bread.
Me: They make sandwiches too.
Gma: Do you know what you and all pretty young ladies should eat?
Me: What's that?
Gma: Cod liver oil
Me: Cod?
Gma: It makes you healthy and you'll live forever.
Me: Gross.
Gma: It is delicious. I have some that has mint and it is wonderful.
Me: Mint flavored cod?

Gma: Do you like sushi?
Me: I love sushi. In fact, I had sushi for dinner last night.
Gma: Did you buy it at Costco?
Me: No, I went to a sushi restaurant.
Gma: Costco has good sushi. What was in your sushi?
Me: We had some with tempura shrimp, avocado, eel...
Gma: Eel?
Me: Yes. Eel.
Gma: Ew...I could never eat eel.
Me: You'll eat mint flavored cod but you won't try eel?

Gma: So I heard you were teaching piano students.
Me: Yes, I'm teaching my mom's while she's away.
Gma: I didn't think you were qualified to teach piano lessons.
Me: Really.
Gma: I've heard you play a little at my house but that's it.
Me: I'm actually a pretty good pianist.
Gma: Well do you know who gets my piano when I die?
Me: Carter.
Gma: Don't you think that's the right decision?
Me: You can do whatever you want with your piano Grandma.

Gma: How is your Dad?
Me: I haven't talked to him in awhile.
Gma: Well Suzi talked to him yesterday.
Me: Then Suzi probably knows how he is.

Spending Trends

I really thought this recession would cause me to take a recess from spending, but it seems to have the adverse effect. Well...kind of. I'm spending more money than I've ever spent before, but what I'm spending it on has changed.

I'm not eating out as much; I'm not buying as many clothes --haven't gone to a lot of movies lately (that probably has more to do with the choices at the box office).

What I am buying is stuff I should have bought a long time ago. For example: tires for my car, new eyeglasses, a crown for my molar. I'm thinking of buying some stuff I've wanted for awhile: Microsoft Office for my Mac, a digital SLR, season tickets to the symphony and ballet. Also, it's time I frame the prints I bought a couple years ago and I keep forgetting I owe the government about $125.

These inclement economic times have also changed my behavior as a consumer. I'm doing things I've never done before. For example, for the first time in my life I have food storage. I have a bunch of food and water on a shelf downstairs in the basement and I'm still adding to it. When I see food on sale, I buy extra and take it downstairs for storage. Good for me, I say. I'm finally following that counsel from my church.

I've always been a comparison shopper and a coupon clipper so that's not new.

Here's something new: On Wednesday I returned my milk to the grocery store. Sure I've returned clothes that didn't fit or electronics that didn't work, but usually if food is bad, I just take it as a loss and toss it. But no, I buy organic milk -- it's $4 for half a gallon (actually only $2.25 with my coupon). The expiration date was freaking May 22 and my milk was SOUR. It was the most disgusting bite of cereal I've ever tasted and, as a result, I wasted a whole bowl of Grape Nut Flakes. That cereal is hard to find. And then I started to put two and two together and realized why my soup tasted funny the night before. Of course, I soured it with my milk. It didn't look clear and chunky as I was pouring it in the pot but that's how it looked in my cereal bowl that morning.

I promptly drove to Smith's Marketplace and traded it for another half gallon. I even requested milk from a different shipment (in case the whole case was rancid). No one gets away with selling me bad, organic, should-be-good-for-another-month milk these days.

I'm also a smarter, more detail-oriented shopper that works harder for what she wants. Last night I went to Burlington Coat Factory because I needed a light weight rain coat to take with me to London next month. I found this really cute London Fog trench -- in my size. Price? $150 -- marked down from $318. I knew London Fog was a nice brand, but c'mon. I wasn't going to spend $150 on a coat at Burlington Coat Factory. If I want a $150 coat I'll go to J. Crew. So I returned it to the rack and didn't look back.

I browsed around a little more. I found the exact same trench coat in an XL. For some reason I looked at the price: $49.99 marked down from $119. Hmmm...interesting. I wouldn't put it past a retail store that is trying to move merchandise to charge more for more popular sizes, but for the original prices to be that different? That makes no sense. So I had to investigate with a store manager. They put the wrong tag on the small.

Good thing I asked.

Evening at the Ballet

Friday night, Annie and I had the privilege of taking our nieces to "Swan Princess" at Kingsbury Hall performed by Children's Ballet Theatre (I danced with them when I was younger -- so did Annie. In fact, last year we discovered we were in the same production of Cinderella. I was a mouse).

Piper (almost 4) loves ballet and even knows how to do an arabesque and Chloe (6) just likes activities so I knew they'd have fun.

They were so good and sat (relatively) still throughout the 2 hr 15 min performance. We had great seats on the front row of the balcony. The Swan Princess was an adaptation of Swan Lake. The music initially scared Piper who plugged her ears throughout the entire overture. But once the dancers came out, she was able to adjust and enjoy it.

In the future, I'm going to be sure to read the program beforehand so I'm prepared to answer the constant questions that will inevitably be asked of me. I'm not a parent, but I assume you get to a point where you just start making stuff up. I reached that point after 5 minutes. Here are some of the questions and comments throughout the production:

"Where are the ballerinas?"

"This is scary."

"What are they doing?"

"Is she a swan too?"

"Is it over?" (Chloe asked this every time the audience clapped during the first half)

"Where are they now?"
Answer: They're having a birthday party.
Follow up question: "Are they going to eat birthday cake?"

"I don't like that dancing."

"I like that dancing."

"Is she older now?"
Answer: "Yes."
Follow up: "How old is she now?"
Answer: "A few years older."
Follow up: "How old?"

"What's the black girl doing in the back?" (she meant the black swan)

"Is she jealous of the white swan?"

"Where's the prince?"

"Is he a bad guy?"

"How many more swans are there?"

"Is it mission yet?" (intermission)

This is a picture of all three adorable little girls. As soon as Chloe found out Annie's niece was also six years old, she wanted to be her best friend for the evening.

At intermission we ate the chocolates Chloe and Piper kindly brought for me and then we walked up and down the stairs inside Kingsbury a couple times, got some water, did a couple twirls (Annie's idea) and then went back to our seats.

Annie, being the genius she is, looked through her program, explained the entire second half before it began and the girls sat quietly enthralled for the rest of the performance.

Planning Ahead

I was going through some old files on my work computer and came across this photo taken back in 2006 at the Alliance for the Varied Arts in Logan. We were waiting for the people we set up an interview with to show.

I love this picture for one reason only: If Lila and I get laid off because of severe budget cuts and we finally decide to fulfill our dream of becoming rap artists, we already have our first album cover.

Our name? Grave Diggaz
Our first single? "Six Feet Blunder"

"You should do it"

I’ve been thinking about Field of Dreams lately. I haven’t actually watched the movie for a few years, but I listen to the soundtrack a lot which makes me think about certain themes in the movie that have stayed with me.

Baseball has nothing to do with why I love this movie, but I doubt very many people like it because it’s about baseball –because it’s not about baseball. One thing I’ve learned about myself when it comes to movies is what speaks most to me in the story is the human relationships that unfold, and I watch them over and over again, even if it is just for a scene that lasts three or four minutes just to see the qualities of that relationship play before me.

One of my favorite things about this story is how unbelievably patient and loving Ray’s wife is and how I think everyone should have someone like that in their life and be that someone for someone else. By that I mean someone who will indulge your gut feelings and not only assist you but also be your advocate in a crazy dream or goal you may have that could actually be realized if only you had the right enablers.

Ray’s faith in building a baseball field on their property was unwarranted and I’m guessing, unprecedented but his wife (Annie) supported him in doing it anyway, even though it was ridiculously expensive and completely impractical.

I love seeing people like this in my “real” life. These are people that have no selfish interests, they just see the potential of what you can achieve and want to watch you make that happen. The product is rarely what matters, it’s seeing you “be you” while you realize the vision you have.

I watched my bishop do this when he pooled all his resources to help one of our ward members write, direct, and produce a musical. He was able to get professional costumes and perform it in an actual theatre (meaning not the cultural hall of the church). Most of us made fun of the grandeur of the project and how seriously he took it, but I smiled through the whole 3 and a half hour production because I couldn’t believe that it was actually happening. Someone let him do this and he is going to remember this and take pride in his accomplishment for the rest of his life, and I was just happy there were people out there who made it happen for him.

How amazing would it be to have someone give you green light after green light as you go ahead with a plan? Instead of presenting road blocks they break them down for you. Maybe it’s because I’ve worked in government for 8 years but that NEVER happens.

If you haven’t seen the documentary Man on Wire yet, rent it. Philippe Petit is a crazy, eccentric man who wants to risk his life by tight rope walking between the twin towers without a net. He has no monetary gain in this at all, he just sees something up high and all it means to him is his next stunt. But what’s more amazing to me is how his friends sacrifice their time and their safety to help their nutty friend realize his dream. It’s not their dream, it’s his and they stick by him to the very end to see him make it happen.

Proposal

You ended each conversation with the assurance that you wanted to take care of me.

You always used kind tones when speaking with me, and greeted me with a sincere smile.

You were clear about what I could expect from you and what you couldn't offer me, but whenever I made a request your answer was that you were "happy" to do that for me.

When there was an issue you took the initiative, and when I did, you were always responsive.

When I told you I wasn't in a position to have this conversation right now, you told me that was perfectly fine and to call back when I was ready.

When I had a difficult time making a decision you were patient and gave me my space, and then when I was ready you were supportive of my choice.

You made a point to talk to me personally about the important things rather than simply exchange emails.

You explained that you would come to me for the things I needed rather than me having to come to you.

You reassured me that if anything like this were to happen again, you would still be there to cover me 100%.


Dear Bear River Insurance: Will you marry me?

My Biggest Google Competitor

It might have been 2003 when I first Googled myself. The thought never crossed my mind before, but somehow, that day, I wondered what one could possibly discover if they typed my name in the search box. So I typed it in. To my surprise, several matches were found.

The first 5 or so were 15 Bytes articles with either my byline attached or my name mentioned in the text, accompanied by my professional title. The next few had my work email and phone as they were from the UAC website.

I clicked through a few of the links – even though I was very familiar with those pages. I guess I was still into my role as “stranger” as I did research on me. I’ll admit, it felt pretty cool with my name out there, published articles and all, being the “go to” girl who had the answers to all your art-related questions.

A couple years ago I was bored and did it again – I Googled myself. But this time, my “results” were trumped by a different Laura Durham. This one was a wedding planner in Florida. She was also a mystery writer, a co-founder of her own business and a blonde.

I felt little and insignificant – kinda like Buzz Lightyear in Toy Story when he walks into the warehouse and sees all the other boxed up Buzz Lightyears and realizes he’s not unique (OK, maybe not that dramatic. I didn’t actually cry for myself like I cried for Buzz). This Laura Durham seems more important and accomplished what with her wedding planning business, published novels and pant suits. She even took our name and made her own .com before I could (not that I ever had plans to).

Yesterday things were slow here at work (when you don’t have money to spend there’s only so much you can do) so I looked me up again. This wedding planner is still at the top of the Google results. I come in number 7 on the list and number 4 is a softball player in Houston. There is also a realtor and a colllege student in Indiana who is the member of some arts committee.

It’s not like I thought I was the only person with my name out there. I mean, I’m glad my parents didn’t try to be unique and name me Timberly or Banjo or something absurd like that. And honestly, I don’t come across many Lauras. But someone with my last name too? It feels funny.

So I guess what I’m saying is I have a new life mission: to accomplish something significant enough that will put me back at the top of the Google search results…although this wedding planner/novelist will be a tough competitor.

And that is the end of my vanity post.

My '98 Prizm: A Retrospective

It was late December 2000 when I bought my first and only car. I was right out of college and working part time. It was a big deal for me. My dad went with me to buy it at Riverton Chevrolet. It was used, about 24K miles. $8500.

I'll never forget the morning after I bought that car. My dad walked into my bedroom (I hadn't woken up yet) with a blank check. He was half laughing, but inside he felt really bad because what he had to tell me was that he just backed into my car as he was coming out of the driveway and scraped it up a bit. He already made arrangements to have it fixed.

Since then, my car has been to the body shop one other time. In April 2003 it scraped up a little bit on North Temple somewhere. The damage wasn't too bad. I actually made $300 off of that deal because my body shop guy did it for real cheap.

It's been a great car. It never breaks down. I've replaced the battery once, the brake pads and the starter. And most recently, the driver's door handle.

A few weeks ago I got in a minor wreck in a parking lot. The damages were assessed at $1800. But yesterday I got a call from my insurance letting me know that the body shop found more damage and the repairs are now closer to $2400. And with that, it is a total loss. $2400 = total loss on my car. My car that I drove around for the past week; runs fine. I had a decision to either fix the car or let it go. When you think that a car has been “totaled” you think “Man, it must have been banged up real bad.” But, no. You want to see what a totaled car looks like?


From looking at it, you'd wonder if I'd need to have it fixed at all. I know that water would get in the trunk if we didn't fix it. And I'm thinking it wouldn't pass inspection either. So after 26 hours of deliberation, I made my final decision to keep it. Why?

1. I've really enjoyed not having car payments these past 5 years. And I've saved a lot of $$$

2. I wasn't planning on getting a new one for another 2 or 3 years anyway. The shop said it would run just as it did before, so really, it's like the accident never happened, except if my car gets totaled again – heaven forbid – my insurance check will be significantly less. I'm banking on that not happening.

3. My insurance payment on this thing is barely anything at all.

4. If I want to go back to school or buy a home in the next year or two, I can't afford a car payment on top of everything else.

5. It's a good little car.

6. It has a full tank of gas.

I really hate making these decisions -- these "Plan B" decisions; decisions I would rather not make. I would like a new car when I'm ready for a new car. Unfortunately, life doesn't work that way. Fortunately, my car wouldn't turn over much of a resale, even without this accident so I don't have to feel too bad about it.

Dear car: you've been good to me. I promise to be good to you. Here's to another couple years.

Depleting Batteries

A long time ago, back when I was applying for jobs, I remember interviewers asking, “What would you say your weaknesses are?”

I don’t remember exactly what I told them. Recently I read a friend’s blog where he proclaimed to have no weaknesses.

I’m not sure I would call this a weakness, but I would say one of the most annoying things about me is that I am always misplacing my cell phone. If it is not in my hand or sitting directly in front of my keyboard, I have no idea where it is. This is why when I answer your calls, I either answer it within one ring, eight rings or I miss it altogether.

About twice a week I have to yell out “Will someone call my phone?” And twice in the past month, someone I've never seen before has walked up to me in a public place and handed me my little red Samsung saying, “Is this yours?” I mean, STRANGERS are keeping a better eye on my phone than I am!

I would like to blame this on my mother. I got some great genes from her (one of her friends just wrote on my Facebook wall telling me I have her wit), but along with those qualities comes a tendency to hide things from ourselves.

Example A: When I was in high school, the portable phone went missing. We “called” it from all over the place but it wasn’t long until we figured the battery had depleted, so we gave up and just started using other phones around the house. Two weeks later I went to retrieve something from my mom’s car trunk and found the phone buried in there.

Example B: A few months ago I was at my parents’ house and found the portable phone sitting in a cactus in the dining room.

Mom’s (absent) mind has a better sense of humor than mine. While her phone is found in crazy, comical places, I usually find my mine in boring places like underneath a pillow, in my car, or in my pocket.

Example A: Last Friday I left my sister in law’s house and got on the 10600 South freeway entrance. After about five seconds (typical) I go into “where’s my phone?” mode and start looking in the normal places: Pockets? No. Little slot in car door? No. Passenger seat? No. Purse? Maybe. Searching a purse and driving aren’t two things you should do at once. I look around in there a little bit and can’t find it. “Crap.” I think, “I must have left it at Kelly’s.” So I get off the 90000 South exit, drive BACK to Kelly’s, get out, go up to the door and ask if my phone is there. We look for it, can’t find it. I ask Kelly to call it. She does. It's in my purse.

Example B: I’m trying to leave the house, and I have to do my routine phone check. I check my back pockets, my front pockets, it’s not there. “Annie! Will you call my phone?” She does…and it’s in my coat pocket – that I’m wearing.

One time, I couldn’t find my phone and no one was home to call it for me so I logged on to my computer, instant messaged my brother and had him call me. What if no one was online? I can’t be this dependent on people all the time (it was under my driver’s seat by the way) and that’s when I decided T-Mobile should have a feature on their website where I could log in and click on a button that says “Call my phone!”

I would LOVE it.

This baffles me, because while I have a near impeccable memory, I can't seem to recall where I set my phone down. Clearly, my problem is I just don’t look hard enough for things. I’m trying to get better. I’m trying to get better. Still, my absent mind is what prevents me from handing over $200 for an iPhone. I just want my phone to be a phone – make calls, send text messages. While combining your camera, calendar, phonebook, iPod and computer into one portable (and misplaceable) device may seem economical to many, it’s just setting me up for devastation.

The house smells funny

Most of you know my parents are in London until the end of June. My dad is the director of BYU's London Study Abroad for the next two terms.

Taking care of things before they left was a big ordeal. Getting a house sitter was something they thought about for the past year, but ultimately they decided it would be strange having someone live there with all their stuff. So instead, their three children are taking turns with the house. My dad asked that we don't bother him with mundane things such as "the house smells funny" but asks that we do tell him if it burned down.

Taking care of things now that they have left is a bit of an ordeal as well. There are various instructions we have. Some more detailed than others (like watering the plants, geez. 1 cup here, 3/4 cup there, one pineapple pitcher full -- still not sure what the pineapple pitcher is). We are supposed to sort the mail into three piles: junk mail, Durham mail and Utah Chamber Artists mail. We were asked to flush the toilets every now and then and take the cars for a spin. And I am teaching 3 of Mom's piano students in her place.

My brother, sister and I have been communicating via phone and email about when we have or plan on stopping by, but mostly we've been leaving notes on the fridge about which tasks were taken care of and when. A couple weeks ago my sister told me the house smells funny. "You know how our bedrooms smell now because no one has been living in them?" she said, "I think that's it. No one's there, no one's cooking anything."

The other day I got a message from my brother saying when he stopped by the house my parents bathroom light was on and the fan was on. He said he hoped it was me or Lisa. It was neither of us. We thought that was pretty strange. And then yesterday I went to the house to teach my mom's piano students and someone was already there. It was my mom's friend Barb who was asked to pick up UCA mail. She was there with her two boys. And she mentioned how she'll come to hang out and her boys just wander around the house and last time she found her oldest upstairs in my parents bathroom at which point, Lisa and I looked at each other, engaging in a quick telepathic pow wow. That explains more than one thing.

Although, what it doesn't explain is what I found in the microwave. I opened it to heat up a piece of quiche and found this:


It took me several seconds (and Lisa's memory) to figure out what it was. Ever wonder what carrots and parsnips look like after sitting out for four weeks? Now you don't have to. Lisa says she remembers Mom putting that in the microwave the night before they left when we were all over for dinner. I guess she forgot to take it out. Gross. I took care of it. I'm hoping that's what the smell was. But I doubt it.

Some of you may have already seen the blog I started for my mom and dad while they're away. It's linked under "family" in the sidebar. It's purpose is to keep family and friends updated on what they're up to since they ask us a lot. Mom and Dad don't blog, so Lisa and I take care of the posting for them. In fact, I hadn't heard from them for awhile so I considered putting this post on their blog, but then decided I should keep it about them and England and not about us, without them, in Salt Lake.

So Mom, Dad...if you're reading this, everything is OK on the homefront. The house is intact (albeit smelly) and despite the light being left on that one time, the rancid food in the microwave, and the power tools left all over the house by that guy who's working on the yard, things are under control, and we're there frequently.

Tours

I have this friend who served an LDS mission here in Salt Lake. On his mission he was introduced to many attractions and collected some obscure stories about some pretty cool (and strange) places. As a result, he developed a rather bizarre tour of the city.

I was first introduced to his tour about a year and a half ago. He set me up on a date and we doubled with him and some other girl because his actual girlfriend was busy (but that’s another story). I loved it. Being from Salt Lake, I’m used to the typical things that make Salt Lake – well, Salt Lake.

What’s great about this tour is that you can do it within 2 or 3 hours. There are some long stops, and some short stops to give it variety. And of course each stop has a mission-related story. I was familiar with most of these places, but here is what was on the 2007 tour:

Gilgal Gardens
Hobbitville (it’s always just a driveby)
Cathedral of the Madeleine (it was closed)
The Virgin Mary Tree
The Garden Park Ward
Summum Pyramid (by Welfare Square)

Last night I did the tour again with my friend Dre and her friend from out of town. Last night was a little different. We made it to the following:

Gilgal Gardens
Cathedral of the Madeleine
The Virgin Mary Tree
The Summum Pyramid
The Mormon Ovens

OK…we didn’t actually make it to the Mormon ovens. And I’m still unclear as to what those really are. He took us up through Federal Heights and then we started walking in the snow. After twenty minutes of hiking I asked if we were there yet and he said we were maybe half way there. The guide’s girlfriend and I decided it was too cold, my wet feet were starting to freeze, and so we turned back. After about 25 minutes of chatting in the car we get a call from him saying, “Hey where you guys at? We need you to come pick us up at the hospital.” Apparently they took a wrong turn and walked over the mountain and out the other side and ended up at Primary Children’s Hospital. So we picked them up and called it a night. Fun…nonetheless. Always a good time.


This got me to thinking about if I had visitors from out of town and were unfamiliar with Salt Lake, what kind of tour would I take them on? First, I would try to get my friend to take them on his tour, because there’s nothing better, but if I were left on my own, I think I would take them to some places I really like and know a little bit about:

The State Capitol Building is one of my favorite buildings in Salt Lake. And I was actually a tour guide there so I know a lot about it. And it’s right by my house so this would be the first stop.






Next stop: the Cathedral of the Madeleine. It’s a beautiful building and a nice complement to the Mormon Temple, so people know other religions thrive here too.





Gotta hit Gilgal Gardens. I mean, a man who built a strange, sculpture garden in his back yard with Mormon-related symbology? A sphinx with Joseph Smith’s head? Awesome. I remember my mom took me there when I was really little. Years later I asked her where that man’s house was with the statues, and then my ward ended up going there one night for an activity.

Then we’d go up to Red Butte Gardens. It's pretty all year long. There are a lot of little gardens and the view is amazing. If I planned it right, we’d get there around sunset where you can see the whole valley.

Then we’d drive down to Temple Square where I’d take them to the tabernacle – if it’s a Thursday night, we’d be able to pop in on the choir rehearsing, which might be exciting for them. If they still let people do that…

And then maybe I’d take them to the Joseph Smith Memorial Building to look around and then take the elevators to the top where you get an awesome view of Temple Square.

We’d also eat somewhere during the tour -- depending. You have to be flexible. Possibilities include Cucina in the Aves or even the Garden at the Joseph Smith Memorial.

Probably not nearly as entertaining as my friend's tour, but it would be informational. If I had another day, I would probably take people to the Spiral Jetty or Antelope Island because, you know the Great Salt Lake and everything. And it’s amazing out there – almost surreal.

Personal Belongings

There’s a lot of talk around here about budget cuts and potential layoffs. No one feels safe. In fact, we were called into a budget meeting several weeks ago and before the meeting, one of my coworkers told me how he put all his belongings in a cardboard box and asked me if I’d send it to him if something happened.

Several months ago I decided it was time to start backing up all my personal files I keep here at work. I didn’t own a computer for a very long time, so all my personal digital photos and documents I kept on my office computer. I finally moved all my photos off my hard drive and onto disks just in case I was called into a meeting and asked to not go back to my office.

After the holidays, I tend to clean things out and start anew. These days, with imminent layoffs and an inclement budget forecast for FY10, gathering important personal items is wise. Because I feel like I’m constantly getting rid of things, I never considered myself a pack rat, but apparently (photos to follow) I keep a lot of things for whatever reason.

I started this job in 2001. The girl before me left a lot of stuff in my desk. I got rid of a lot of it but kept some of it. Like these pastels. These may have been here for years before her time too judging from the design and look of the box. I guess I thought someday I would get artsy and draw a picture with them. Hasn’t happened.

Back in 2003 I took a nonfiction writing course up at the University. I submitted a series of emails I sent to my friend Ilene. Ilene and I had this thing where we would watch 7^th Heaven just so we could write to each other and bash on it. After the course I got this email from the instructor who encouraged me to publish them. Never did. But I like to keep this around as a reminder that a professional writer thought I was publishable.

This here is a phone holder. My mom (or Santa Claus, can’t remember which) gave this to me. I’ve had this ever since I’ve had my first phone. Back then phones were big enough to fit snugly in there. No longer.

Oh right, along with the pastels, I decided to keep these little circle stickers. We use them to indicate a piece out in the gallery is sold…so not very often. Martha Stewart showed me how to make decorative streamers with them. So a few Christmases ago I made a bunch of these and hung them from the windows in my office. Except this year. I forgot.

I never really found a good place for this little stained glass window my mom brought back for me from someplace. I think it’s supposed to be the rose window at Notre Dame. It looks good placed up against a blank word doc on my computer screen though doesn’t it?

The dolphin stamp. My coworker left this on my desk once, or maybe he even handed it to me as a “gift.” The cool thing about this stamp is that it lights up when you press down on it. I keep it around because my friend’s son likes to play with it when they come to visit.

I forgot I put all this salt and pepper in a plastic baggie. I don’t remember where I found it but apparently I felt strongly that they be kept around. I think I kept it around for my edamame I used to snack on in the afternoon.

It’s amazing how much personal stuff one accumulates at their office. I’ve heard horror stories of people getting laid off and then not being allowed to come back and save files on their computers or emails or pictures. I have a bunch of CDs here, books, toys – for the kids that come to visit. Maybe it’s time I transfer the important things to a more secure environment.

Looking Back..and Ahead

As my friend Carri and I drove home from a ski trip last week, we discussed “New Years” resolutions and goals. We asked each other about the goals we set last year. I didn’t formally set any, but I’m always trying to better myself.

As I look back on this past year and the things I remember consciously telling myself “this is important to do” I can, in retrospect, see a cohesiveness and common purpose. And as I examine what I was trying to do, it has become clear that I was trying to heal my soul.

I think our confidence and spirit can be damaged in many ways by things that happen to us, people that hurt us, and mostly things we do to hurt ourselves. I decided I didn’t want to do anything to hurt myself; I didn’t want to deprive myself of opportunities for whatever reason, and I was going to embrace what I love without limiting myself or shrinking for fear of comments from critics (and my own demons). I was going to stop inventing obstacles or reasons why I shouldn’t have what I want.

In retrospect, I can see why certain things were important to me in 2008. I'll share some:

1) I began the year volunteering at the Capitol building as a docent. I adore that building. It was always something I looked to on the hill when I was young. It was almost a beacon, straight ahead; a focal point of beauty, truth and order. Being able to go inside seemed like a special privilege. Now I live a block and a half away from that building, and once it was restored and open to the public, I knew I wanted to be part of it’s history so I spent two weeks telling people about the architecture, the artwork and the function of the building. I loved it.

2) At the beginning of the year I decided I was going to take every opportunity I could get to travel in 2008. I have expressed before how important travel is to me. I need it to reboot my mind, to discover new things and indulge my curiosity. I went to D.C. with my dad and we packed our days with tours, lectures, performances, and what I maintain to be the best meal I can remember. I traveled to Wales, England and France with the Utah Chamber Artists. The best part about that trip was having my mother, brother, aunt, uncle and a couple cousins with me. Spending time away with them was a treat that doesn’t come around often enough. Going to Aruba with friends was the most relaxing and carefree trip of the year. No schedule, no expectations, just going with the flow – which is good for a planner like me. I visited my best friend in Idaho in November and there’s nothing like just sitting next to your best friend that reminds you who you are, what you love about yourself and what you want for yourself. New York City was just fun. I probably spent more money there without thinking about it, and if you decide beforehand that spending too much money is what you’re going to do, it is liberating.

3) In the fall, I joined the Utah Chamber Artists. Something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, but always pushed aside. It has enriched my life in so many ways. Rehearsals are time consuming, but I love them. Performing again has been exciting. Sharing a common talent with 40 people that are so different from one another is a fun and unique experience. And being able to sing and spend time with my mother and my brother has made it even more rewarding.

4) Something that I never thought I would do was actually stick to a regular exercise regimen. I’m using “regular” and “exercise” so loosely, it’s ridiculous. But I instigated a weekly yoga class at work. I don’t do the gym, so I thought if I hired someone to come to ME and my coworkers, we would be more likely to accomplish our goal. So every Tuesday, we have a yoga instructor come to our building and about 6 or 7 of us spend an hour with him. It has taught me patience, calm, focus, and in many cases how to relax. I’m sure I’ll learn much more as we progress and our workouts get more challenging.

Healing your soul is a lifelong pursuit because life’s knocks will always come around. I plan to keep looking for ways to reintroduce myself to what I love and what I need.

I’ve been preparing for the next art exhibit here at my gallery. We are doing a commemorative show on an artist who passed away right before Thanksgiving. I am sorting through all his notebooks and am realizing that he collected a lot of affirmations and other encouraging quotes and articles to help him achieve his goals. I decided to use them in the exhibit. A couple really stood out to me and that is a definition of the word “elegance” that I never thought of before:

“Elegance is the use of the least amount of energy to accomplish what you are after. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line. That’s elegance.”

"To know what you want, to know why you want it, to have impeccability and a vision, and to step into it -- that is elegance."

Elegance is going to be one of my goals for 2009. I know it takes a lot of work to achieve what we want, but I believe we have a tendency to make things more difficult than they need to be. If we have clarity, vision and purpose and apply that to our decisions and behavior, we can accomplish what we are after with ease – and elegance.

1996-2008

Dear Scooter Badooder,

I'm sorry I didn't really get to say goodbye, but I kind of knew I wouldn't see you again, which is why, on Christmas Eve, I let you sleep in the middle of my bed while I balanced on the edge all night trying not to fall off.

You've been a good kitty these past 13 years. I only lived with you for about 5 of those, and I know we gave you to Mom for Mother's Day, but I'll still think of you as my kitty too. I know I didn't appreciate it at the time, but it was sweet of you to kill all those mice for us and good job dissecting those birds. And then there was that one spring where you managed to bring a praying mantis home every night around 10:30 -- that was fun.

I can tell you've been lonely these past few years without Buddha. Even though he would sort all the "inedible" kibble from his bits and eventually eat all your food, you two got along really well, and now you can say hi to him for me. Buddha will probably introduce you to our two previous cats: Oliver and Kitty. Kitty's real name is Charcoal Tubby Durham but believe me, he'll only answer to "Kitty". Be nice to each other up there. You were all equally important to us. Kitty will probably brag about how he owned the neighborhood, and even all of us -- as we were scared of him a lot of the time, but you can one up him and say how you got us to maintain 4 different kinds of food in 4 different food bowls for you. You can also make fun of him for climbing up on the roof and not knowing how to get down. Oliver wasn't with us for very long, so he may not have a whole lot to say. Don't gang up on Oliver, he's a sweetheart.

Tell the story about when you went missing for two weeks. That's a good one. We assumed you were a rug out on 1300 East, but one night, you just showed up, wondering where your food was, like you just hopped out of a DeLorean* and no time had passed at all. I wish I knew where you were and what you did. Maybe you can tell me someday.

You're a sweet kitty. You were demanding, wanting only running water to drink; needing to sleep on my chest with your face right in front of mine, but I love you anyway.

You always wanted me to be awake when you were awake, even if it was 2 AM.
But I love you anyway.

You chewed up hundreds of dollars worth of clothes, rugs and blankets.
But I love you anyway.

When Oliver died, Dad read to us from Moses 3:5..."For I, the Lord God, created all things, of which I have spoken, spiritually, before they were naturally upon the face of the earth..."

I'm not sure if Mom and Dad, or even I will live with another kitty, but we will always remember you and we will miss you.


*kinda borrowed this line from Cameron

Cold Remedies

I am not happy with my immune system these days. This is the second cold I've had in the past two months. I used to NEVER get colds. I think I went three straight years without getting a cold. I was getting more sleep back then though.

Fortunately, this cold is not nearly as bad as the last one. I thought the last one was going to kill me. I had it mid November. That cold was strange, because it hit me every other day. It's like I had a day off from my cold and then the next day it came back with a vengeance.

Because I'm fairly new to the cold, I am completely ghetto when it comes to meds. My two old roommates introduced me to Airbourne and Cold Eeze lozenges. I've had the NyQuil conversation with many people. Most people love it...I hate it. I have this memory of me sitting at my bed when I was about 14 years old, holding a little 1 oz plastic cup with bright green syrup in it trying not to gag at the sight of it. I stared at it for a good ten minutes before I finally took the shot. I hate that feeling of alcohol going down my throat and then having it linger there. I swore I would never drink the devil's poison again.

And then last November, I drank some. My cold was bad. My head felt like it was going to fall off my body and I needed to get through a day of work. I'm a grown up now, it was time to grow up and drink the nasty stuff. It wasn't as awful as I feared but it wasn't good. And I tasted that stuff for the next two days. I've sworn it off again.

Anyway, again, last November I called my sister who seems to be sick all the time now that she has a kid, and told her I had a cold. She said to take Zycam. But apparently it was too late for Zycam. I was past the sore throat stage. Now it was time for Mucinex. I popped one of those right before going out to dinner with friends. I felt great. But the next day I started to act loopy and was told I wasn't answering questions.

Now, about six weeks later, I am currently on Zycam and Mucinex. Only this time I am drinking ALL THE TIME because I figured out the last time I took Mucinex I didn't eat or drink anything that day and so I was SEVERELY dehydrated. I'm feeling a little better, but still kinda dizzy.

Because I'm not used to being sick, I'm not used to all the remedies people have for the common cold, but I'm open to try them. The last time I was sick, Annie gave me some tea that was supposed to soothe my throat. Eh. She also gave me this eucalyptus ball that you're supposed to throw in a pot of boiling water and then hover over it with a towel over your head. I tried it. It did clear up my sinuses for a little while. Some girl in my choir told me to gargle with Listerine. She said the alcohol kills the germs in your throat and that's where the cold starts.

Everyone seems to have different ones. We just had people over for ward prayer. My plan was to stay upstairs and out of the way, but I ended up staying downstairs and talking to people. Here is what I got tonight:

Gargle with salt water (tried that when I was little, made me gag)
Drink the caramel apple cider at Starbucks.
Airbourne.

Here's my thing with airbourne and zycam and cold eeze and anything else that is supposed to "shorten" your cold. I use this stuff, but I'm not sure if there's any way of knowing if it works or not. You're only supposed to take a certain amount of airbourne within 24 hours or else it will damage your liver. I will watch the clock, counting down the minutes until I can take the next one. I can take zycam every four hours. I've been taking airbourne AND zycam for the past 24 hours and I'm feeling ok. My throat is still a little raw. I think what's mostly making me feel crummy right now is the effects of Mucinex. Maybe I just have a less severe cold, or maybe if I haven't been taking these remedies, it would be way more intense, I don't know. Here is what I do know: NyQuil makes me gag and say things I wouldn't normally say. Mucinex makes me dizzy, nauseous, and incoherent.

Oh look, it's 10 PM and it's time for another Zycam.

NYC 2008

Special thanks to the following:

Jane and Maria for free lodging and playing with me.
SLCVB for the free Nutcracker tickets.
Annie's client Mary for lunch in Chinatown.
Clay for house tickets at his play.
Our bishop for sponsoring dessert at Carnegie Deli
Annie for inviting me in the first place.

No thanks to the following:

The lady on my flight over who claimed the empty seat between us as her own.
The downpour after the Nutcracker for soaking my shoes
The lady on 96th street for looking me up and down in disapproval. Yes, I know, my red coat did not match my purple skirt. I pack light.

Santas and Snowmen

Last month my mom told me she’s ready to go back to her Scandinavian Christmas tree. When I was much younger she had a Scandinavian themed tree but about ten years ago she went to a different kind of theme with “bubble gum” lights and lots of shiny ornaments.

We sat down at her computer so she could show me pictures of all the Christmas ornaments she plans on making for her tree. I made about 6 or 7 of these Santa tomtes with my mom for my tree this year – which is Scandinavian actually, but mostly because I bought my ornaments at IKEA last year. But I love my homemade tomtes.

Anyway, as we clicked through dozens of websites with crafts, fabrics and other ornaments Mom started talking about her mother and the things Grandma would make when she was little. Mom said a lot of the stuff we were looking at was just like it. I don’t think my mom noticed, but I had to wipe away a few tears as a wave of nostalgia came over me and I suddenly missed my Grandma Christensen.

Grandma died nine years ago of ovarian cancer. She was fairly young. I miss her all the time.

I think about my Grandma a lot, especially at Christmastime, since every Christmas Eve was spent at her house. We always had a Christmas program and every year it was a tradition to beg Grandma to sing “Baby it’s Cold Outside” with my Grandpa. She had to tear herself away from whatever was keeping her busy in the kitchen, but she always gave in (that's my mom playing the piano and her bridal picture on the piano).

I had the honor of speaking at Grandma's funeral, and this is one of the memories I shared:

One thing about Grandma was that everything in her house had its place and she knew where everything was at all times. When I was very little, my brother and sister and I were staying at Grandma and Grandpa’s house while our parents were on vacation. Grandma took me into Uncle Tony’s old room to show me a flashlight that she thought I might like to see. She took me to the desk, pulled open the drawer and pulled out the flashlight. Because it was made with clear plastic, I could see the batteries inside. The batteries were blue with pictures of snowmen printed on them. I loved the flashlight and immediately imagined how fun it would be to play with it in the dark when everyone else was asleep. So later that day when she was in the kitchen I took it out of its drawer, brought it into the TV room where I’d be sleeping later and hid it in my sleeping bag.

That night, Grandma came to tuck us in. She felt something at the bottom of my sleeping bag and asked me what it was. I told her I didn’t know and she said goodnight and went to bed. Unfortunately, I ended up sleeping straight through the night so my plans of playing with the snowman flashlight in the dark never happened. When I woke up, I remembered I had the flashlight in there and thought I better replace it before Grandma was up. I felt for it at the bottom of my sleeping bag. It was gone! I panicked as I got up and turned my sleeping bag upside down; shaking it in hopes the flashlight would fall out. It wasn’t there. I froze for a few moments for fear of what likely happened. I tiptoed past Grandma and Grandpa’s bedroom and into the room with the desk where she kept it and opened the drawer to find the flashlight back in its proper place exactly where she left it before. I learned at an early age there was no fooling Grandma.


Sometimes I feel bad for my younger cousins because they didn’t get to experience Christmas at Grandma and Grandpa’s house like I did. But then again, I’m sure their Christmases are just as special to them as mine were to me. I just hope my kids get to spend many, many Christmases with their grandparents.

Last night when I climbed into bed I closed my eyes and tried to remember what Grandma's hugs felt like. And I realized they kind of felt like my mom's hugs. And that made me happy.

Skimpy

I was buying evaporated milk a couple weeks ago for a fudge recipe. Sometimes when I make grocery lists, I put down the box or can size I need so I can be sure I get the right amount for the recipe. Evaporated milk is pretty standard: they have small cans and large cans. I found my Carnation evaporated milk and started to put it in my cart when I noticed it was a 12 oz can. I looked at my list and I noted a 14 oz can. I looked on the shelf to see if other brands offered 14 oz cans, but unfortunately, there weren’t any other brands. I asked a guy shelving the cake mixes, “Does evaporated milk come in 14 oz cans?” He clearly didn’t know, because he came over, looked at my can, looked at the cans on the shelf, and then said “Guess not.” Thanks. I guess I didn’t really expect there to be 14 oz cans, I was just kind of verbalizing what seems to be happening with a lot of products: downsizing.

It seems to be the manufacturer’s way of increasing prices without increasing prices. It’s sneaky, but it’s kind of genius. They actually had a segment about this on the Today Show this morning. I think companies know that increasing prices will have a more negative impact on their sales. I’m not THAT picky about my brands, so if Kellogg’s Raisin Bran is even 30 cents less than Post, I’ll go for the Kellogg’s.

Fortunately, I’m a savvy shopper. I don’t know how or when I started looking closely at prices per ounce, but it has changed the way I shop for groceries. I make sure I’m getting the most for my money. And now is definitely the time to do that, as you’ll see Skippy skimping on their ounces, even though the jar will look like the same size. If you turn the jar upside down, you’ll see the bottom is more concave than it used to be. You’ll notice tuna cans are a little shorter, and cereal boxes are a little thinner, or the bags inside are a little smaller – sneaky. Even though your eyes can deceive you, prices per ounce can’t (without a law suit).

Honestly, if their production costs are up, and the natural solution is to make the consumer pay more, in most cases, I would prefer they give me less product than increase the price. I went ahead with my fudge recipe using 12 oz of the evaporated milk. I may have put in a bit less chocolate and sugar and butter to even everything out. The recipe didn’t suffer for it. I don’t really care or notice if I have fewer potato chips or Golden Grahams. I don’t care if my Kleenex sheets are one inch shorter; I probably didn’t need the whole surface area of the Kleenex anyway – as long as I’m getting the same amount of sheets. The downsizing is working on me. I’m still buying their products because they’re the same price (or in some cases, less).

I was a little put off last week when I went to Big City Soup and saw prices underneath the pieces of bread they used to give you for free. You would get bread, 1 oz of Tillamook cheese and some mints. Now if I wanted bread it was going to cost me $1.39. I looked at how much my soup cost and saw that the price went down. Ahh...but the price didn't really go down did it. The cashier asked me if I wanted bread. “Does it come with the soup?” Again, stupid question, because I already knew the answer, I was just making the point that I was hip to their little a la carte scheme. I decided I didn’t want bread. I never eat all of it anyway. I’m really just there for the soup (although I really like that cheese). With tax, my soup cost me $5 even. Nice. So with the bread and cheese, it would have cost me a little over $7. That’s only 75 cents more than I paid in the past when all 3 items came together as a meal deal – interesting that I opted for the lower price for less food.

Come to think of it, I would kind of prefer that restaurants give me smaller portions than increase prices on their dishes. I don’t need that much food – especially at Mexican restaurants. I can name about a dozen guys I’ve been to lunch with that would wholeheartedly disagree with my price/portion philosophy but I am littler than they are. As is my metabolism. If I'm disciplined enough to not overeat, I usually end up taking it home for lunch the next day, but some food doesn’t refrigerate well, and sometimes I didn’t like it and don’t want to eat it again.

I guess the point is restaurants and food companies are being sneaky to get the most out of the consumer. One of my favorite movie scenes ever is in Father of the Bride. Remember when Steve Martin just hits the fan after he starts to come to terms with how much his daughter’s wedding is going to cost? He goes to the grocery store for hot dogs and hot dog buns and starts removing buns from half his bags because he’s angry that hot dogs come in packages of 10 and buns come in packages of 8, so the victimized consumer has to buy two packages of buns in order to have enough for the 10 hot dogs but is left with “superfluous” buns.

I feel like I waste a lot of food like that, especially being single and cooking for myself. I can’t eat a whole loaf of bread by myself (they sold half loafs for awhile, but the price wasn’t worth it). Produce is the worst. Rarely do I eat a whole head of lettuce or all that celery by myself. It’s hard and I end up with wasted food. My sour cream goes bad, my can of refried beans goes bad, my pasta sauce goes bad. I’m not saying I like getting less for my money, but if manufacturers are struggling in this economy, I’d rather pay the same price for fewer ounces than pay more and end up wasting food I couldn’t eat by myself.

Rooty-toot-toots and Rummy-tum-tums

If you haven’t spoken with me or you haven’t noticed the ad on the sidebar of my blog, I have a Christmas concert coming up next week with the Utah Chamber Artists. The concert is on Monday and Tuesday.

Tickets are $10 for students and $15 for non-degree seeking adults. However, because the executive director is a close, personal mother of mine and I do free design work for them, I was given a limited number of $5 tickets for friends/family who would like to come.

This year’s Christmas concert is at the First Presbyterian Church on South Temple. It’s going to be awesome. I only have ten $5 tickets though. I’m actually not sure if more than ten people (in town) read my blog and are interested in a ticket, but this is what I came up with as far as divvying them out:

Below is a Christmas carol quiz*. Here are the rules:

1. Pick one question that hasn’t already been answered by a previous commenter and if you get it right, and you want to come to the concert, you can have a $5 ticket.
2. Tell me which night you prefer, Monday or Tuesday (both concerts are at 7:30 PM.

Here are the limitations:

1. Only one ticket per commenter. If you want to bring a date, you can purchase more tickets at utahchamberartists.org or from me.
2. You have to pay me by Sunday, December 7th
3. If something comes up and you can't make it, please try to find someone to use it, or try to give me 48 hours notice and I'll find someone who will use it. There’s a reason we do the Christmas concert two nights instead of one.

If there are more than ten comments on here and you still want to come to the concert, I hope you will anyway, even if you have to pay full price. You won’t be sorry. I know several of my blog readers came to the last concert in October and loved it.


1. "The Christmas Song" refers to "folks dressed up like---

Elves
Angels
Eskimos
Chewbacca


2. What were the last words of Frosty the Snowman?

"Hold my beer and watch this."
"Catch me if you can!"
"Ahh, I can't wait to get in that hot shower."
"I'll be back again someday."


3. In "Joy to the World," Jesus is said to rule the world with ---

Truth and grace
Love and hope
Mercy and care
Clout and cash


4. In "The Little Drummer Boy," how does Baby Jesus react to the stylings of the impoverished percussionist?

He smiles
He nods and keeps time with the ox and lamb
He sleeps in heavenly peace
He weeps inconsolably because, like almost everybody else, he too hates "The Little Drummer Boy."


5. When the angels proclaim the birth of Jesus to the shepherds in "Angels We Have Heard on High," they sing, "Gloria, in excelsis Deo." This is Latin for:

Fa la la
Such a glorious day!
Gloria is with Mary in the stable
Glory to God in the highest


6. "Hannuka, Oh Hannuka" tells us to come light---

The Yule log
The menorah
The dreidl
The latkes


7. In "Carol of the Bells," what is it that the "sweet silver bells" seem to be saying?

Merry Christmas
Christ is born of Mary
Throw cares away
Let's eat!


8. "Up on the Housetop" contains a reference to Santa bringing several toys that would not pass muster with child-safety watchdog groups. Which of the following gifts is NOT mentioned in the song?

A whip
A hammer
Tacks
An asbestos teddy bear

9. In "Jingle Bells," the singer says that one day he went out on the snow and fell on his back. A gentleman then came by in a one-horse open sleigh. What does he do?

He sings a song
He lifts the fallen man and carries him inside
He alights from his sleigh and falls down himself
He laughs and rides away

10. In "Winter Wonderland," the singers build a snowman, and pretend that he is Parson Brown. What is their answer when this fictional clergyman asks if they are married?

Oh, yes
No, man!
Get lost!
As if!


*Quiz taken from the Chicago Tribune.

Oh, and if anyone can enlighten me as to what a "rummy-tum-tum" is I will personally buy your ticket.