I Wanna Be Like Mom

I’ve mentioned before how few people can make me laugh harder than my mom. I don’t remember her being this funny when I was little. Maybe as you grow up you get to know your parents better, and so their humor starts to make more sense once you really understand where they’re coming from.

Sometimes her humor borders on the inappropriate which, of course, adds another level of hilarity. The other night Mom showed me how she was cleaning and rearranging all the shelves in her living room. And then she tried to give me one of those plaster statuettes of Jesus in Gethsemane. When I was sitting at the piano she carried it to me, preciously, with a smile that knew I probably didn’t want it anymore than she did. She told me she made it.

“When did you make that?”

“Long time ago. I can’t believe you’ve never noticed it.”

“When?”

“It’s been sitting on those shelves for the past 20 years!”

“I’ve never noticed it there.”

“Why do I do anything?”

“Why don’t YOU want it?”

And then she looked down at it, paused for a couple seconds and said, “It has delighted me long enough.”

And then I continued to play the piano but had to stop after about 30 seconds because I couldn’t stop laughing at the implication that Mom has grown out of Jesus.

Today is Mom’s birthday and I wanted to share some of my favorite things about her.

She is very creative and crafty -- hence the plaster Jesus. She probably made that back when she was in that Family Home Evening group where a bunch of mothers got together and planned FHE activities and shared ideas for their families. Mom actually makes a lot of cool things and I know if I want to make something and don't know how, all I have to do is ask her -- and if she doesn't know how to do it, she'll figure it out.

Mom loves to give gifts whether it’s for a special occasion or she just saw something and thought of you. I remember one Christmas, she kept finding stuff after the holiday was over and gave it to me saying, “Santa meant to give this to you earlier.”

Mom is a great travel companion. She loves to explore and learn new things. I was able to spend two weeks with her in Wales, England and Paris last summer and then again for three weeks last May when I went to London to visit her and my dad.

This is a rather recent development, but if Mom notices me looking at something in a store she’ll say, “Do you want me to buy that for you Honey?” I usually tell her she doesn't have to do that, but if you say you don't want what you're looking at she'll buy you something else without you knowing about it. In fact, we were in the Christ Church Cathedral Gift Shop in Oxford and someone noticed my mom doing this and asked, “So, how it works is you point at something and Becky will buy it for you?” Pretty much. About a week later we were at Durham Cathedral. Mom, Dad and I all split up for 30 minutes to explore the cathedral and then met up for show and tell. I told them how much I loved the contemporary stained glass window by the entrance. After that Dad and I climbed the cathedral tower. On the way down I said, “How much you wanna bet Mom went into the gift shop and bought me a postcard of that stained glass window?” Dad didn’t take the bet because he knows Mom all too well. Sure enough, we met Mom at the bottom and she presented me with a postcard and everything she learned about the window from her guidebook.

Mom loves holidays and celebrating everything. She has boxes of decorations for every holiday. Growing up we would have to take apart the entire set up in the family room to make way for all her Christmas stuff. She also decorates for Halloween, Valentines Day, Independence Day, Thanksgiving and Easter. She was always introducing new and interesting ways to dye Easter eggs.

Mom loves to entertain and no one throws a better party. Everyone who came to my 30^th birthday party at my parents’ house can attest to this. She went all out for dinner (for 50 of my friends), went to the trouble of mailing invitations and she even planned games. When I was little I loved it when Mom planned parties. I specifically remember the Christmas singing parties, The Tabernacle Choir Hanukah party (or something like that – there was Jewish food and my Dad’s Tab Choir friends came), Dad’s spontaneous 40^th surprise birthday party, and then the small dinner parties. I remember one in particular when we invited a family over. Mom wanted to do placecards, but wasn’t sure how to spell one of the kid's names who was coming. So she just misspelled everyone’s name.

I love how Mom knows what’s important to me and she wants me to have it – even if it isn’t necessarily important to her.

I love that we look the same -- especially when we were little. It makes more sense for siblings to look alike because their DNA is more alike, but I can always differentiate between Lisa and myself in pictures, however, sometimes I’m not sure if that little girl with dark hair and bangs is me or my mom.

I think I like that we look the same because any comparison between me and my mom is the biggest compliment in the world. She puts her heart, soul, genius and precious time into everything she does. You talk to anyone who knows Becky and they can’t say anything before telling you how much they adore and admire her and how brilliant she is.

At some point, my mom started asking for my advice on certain matters and ideas and projects. It’s a wonderful feeling that she can trust me and appreciate me in that way and still be my mommy as she continues to deliver Easter baskets, bring me valentines and buy me toys.

I'm Actually a Very Bright Person

I worry about me sometimes. There were two incidents today:

1. Troubleshooting with my printer connection.

I spent 20 minutes this morning installing new cartridges in my printer and then trying to figure out why my computer couldn't find my printer. I plugged the USB cord into the back of the printer and for some reason, the print jobs would just line up in the queue but the jobs would be stopped.

Finally, this evening I found a friend online who professed to be "handy" at one point. I asked him to come over and look at it. He fiddled with it for awhile. He decided it needed an updated driver. He asked me where the USB plugs into the computer. I looked down at the carpet and handed him the USB cable and watched him plug it into the back of my Mac as I thought, "You have got to be kidding me" (you being me, by the way). "Laura you MORON." I played it cool as I thought, "That couldn't have been the only problem." Fortunately, it wasn't. The computer still couldn't find the printer. I was a little relieved to be honest. Then he bent down behind the printer and when he looked up he was holding the other end of the cable that plugs into the back of the printer. I swear that was plugged in earlier. He was nice not to make fun of me. At least I have an updated driver now.

2. Troubleshooting with my contact lenses.

Earlier today, before I headed out for Father's Day festivities, I went into the bathroom and put my contact lenses in. It's not uncommon that one of my lenses has some lint or something in it that irritates my eye so I have to take it out, rinse it and try it again. I did this a few times. I went out into the living room sat on the couch and thought, "I can see better without these," as my right eye tried to focus. I went back to the mirror, took them out again, cleaned them, put them back in and then want back out to the couch. My right eye felt better, but I had this strange sensation in my left eye, like my lens was so heavy it was sinking. I went back into the bathroom, took out the lens in my left eye and discovered I put both lenses in my left eye. No wonder my right eye felt so good.

No, I don't want Lasik.

B Plans

When I was younger, I played this game with magazines or catalogs where I would flip to a random page and ask myself questions such as:

If I had to wear one dress on this page, which would it be?
If I had to eat one thing on this page what would it be?
If I had to marry one boy on this page who would it be?

I think a lot of girls played this game. At least my friends and cousins played it with me. What made the game even more fun was when your choices were less than desirable.

The funny thing about that last question is I remember at recess in grade school giggly girls would cluster around the pavement while the boys played base soccer and ask, “If one of the boys in our class had to be your boyfriend who would it be?”

More often than not we chose the same guy. Interesting – and a little revealing as to how few we regarded as “dateable”.

A couple years ago I went to a softball game to watch a group of friends from my ward play, as I often did. One of the girls from my ward was watching the game as well. She scooted next to me and whispered, “If you had to marry one of those boys out there tomorrow, who would it be?” I wasn’t surprised at her question because this was actually her favorite game. She played it at parties, at barbecues, in Sunday School…

Funny thing was, even though I adored all my friends out there, my choice as to who I would actually marry was the same as hers. And she informed me the other girls she polled previously had the same answer.

Things really haven’t changed much since 4th grade.

How practical we were at such an early age. The questions weren’t set up as “If you could” they were “If you had to”. We already understood it was futile to think in ideals. We had to look at the page in front of us and make our decision based on availability. If someone took away that page and you were allowed to have unlimited options you probably would have a different answer – what you REALLY wanted whether it was real or imaginary.

Why do we feel we must resolve ourselves to settle for something simply because it’s in front of us? Is it because we think what we really want isn’t available or "out of stock"? Do we think we're being unrealistic, too picky and should be happy with what we have in front of us?

I know I'm using boys as an example here, but I'm talking about all choices we have to make. Where we want to live, what job we want, what skills we want, what dreams we have.

If you’re familiar with Randy Pausch, he said something in his famous “Last Lecture” that I really liked. He said brick walls aren’t put there to keep us out; they’re put there to show us how badly we want something.

I guess sometimes we just don’t want something bad enough. I know that’s true for me in certain situations. But we also learn as we grow up that we don’t always (or sometimes ever) get what we planned no matter how much effort we put into it.

I was in a car with one of my good friends the other night and I told her I’m beginning to think life is just a long strand of “B Plans”. But what I think to be more true, is that life isn’t about plans at all. It’s about the opportunities that come to you, the choices you make, and how you deal with the consequences – good or bad. It’s about what you do with what you’re given.

It’s like that old saying, “Life is what happens while you’re busy making plans.” Hopefully you’re making the most of what is given to you and you accept accountability for the choices you make. And then maybe later you realize the choices you made opened up possibilities that weren’t even on the page you were looking at to begin with.

I’m not building up to reveal any life lesson I’ve learned here. I don't write from any specific retrospect or hindsight. I'm old enough to have gained a little bit of hindsight, but I have yet to prove what I’m saying is true to my life and everything works out for the best and if we live right and make wise choices we eventually find what we really want -- whether it was there to begin with or not.

I’m counting on it though.

My England Stats

I make it a point not to blog unless I have something I really want to say. This isn't a diary for me or even a log of my life. It's stories, ideas, etc. -- things that are important or amusing to me.

But I was in England for the past few weeks, and although I have a couple stories I want to develop and write about, I'm tired. Instead of writing about everything I did, I'm going to make a list of everything I did. I am a list person, and one of my favorite types of lists is categorized lists. I even categorize my shopping lists. Anyway, I'm impressed with everything I packed in, so to me, my activities are worth listing.

Here is England 2009: Things I did, listed categorically.

PLAYS SEEN

Calendar Girls
Jersey Boys
The Winslow Bow
The 39 Steps


CONCERTS ATTENDED

Norwegian Chamber Orchestra at Cadogen Hall
London Symphony Orchestra at the Barbican


SERVICES ATTENDED

Eucharist at Southwark Cathedral
Matins at Durham Cathedral
Evensong at Westminster Abbey
Sacrament Meeting at the London Brittania Ward


CATHEDRALS/CHURCHES VISITED

Southwark Cathedral
St. Paul’s Cathedral
Durham Cathedral
Exeter Cathedral
Truro Cathedral
Christ Church Cathedral
Westminster Abbey
St. Mary Abbots
St. Pancras Church


HISTORICAL HOMES

Jane Austen’s Home (Chawton)
Benjamin Franklin’s Home (London)
Blenheim Palace (Churchill’s Family Home)
Kensington Palace (Queen Victoria’s Home)
Apsley House (Duke of Wellington’s Home)
The Old Post Office (Tintagel)
Kenwood House (Hampstead)


MUSEUMS ATTENDED

National Gallery
National Portrait Gallery
Churchill Museum
Victoria and Albert Museum
The Museum of Smuggling and Fishing


OTHER PLACES OF INTEREST

The British Library
Oxford University
Cabinet War Rooms
Royal Albert Hall
Harrods
Tintagel
Polperro
Durham Castle
Porthcurno


MARKETS PERUSED

Borough Market
Spitalfields Market
Covent Garden


RIDES RIDDEN

The London Eye
The Tube

Not bad eh? There are still things I wanted to do and places I wanted to go, but there's always next time. Next time I'll go to Kew Gardens and Greenwich and the Museum of Brands, Packaging and Advertising.

I created an England 2009 album on my Facebook page, so if you have access to that and want to check it out, please do. I got a new camera and it was fun learning how to use it.

No one better lay a finger on her Butterfinger.

The other day I was at a conference. Several display tables were set out and one of them had a big basket of candy for the taking. When I approached the candy, there was a girl standing there.

"Sorry, I got the last Butterfinger," she said.
"Oh really? Dangit."
"Oh, wait!" she said, "There's one more."

And then she took it.
Dead serious.

While You Were Away...

This post is for Dad because when he calls me from London, he usually asks about the house. He seems concerned that it's being trashed by either us or neighborhood vandals when we're not there.

You can't blame him, leaving your home for 6 months can be a little unsettling. So last time I was there, I decided to take some pictures. I apologize for the low quality, these were actually taken with my cell phone because I didn't have a real camera with me.

Here is the north side of the house. Doesn't look too bad...

Front porch...

Family Room/Kitchen area...

Living Room.

Mail Room. Junk mail is piling up...

Here's the fridge. Looks like you have some fry sauce from Arctic Circle waiting for you. I'm thinking that was Lisa. I'm going to say the yoplait is Kelly's. And I'm going to say the fountain drink is mine.

I can't guarantee this is how it will look when you get home. This is how it looked as of April 24.

Selections from Today's Phone Conversation with Grandma Durham

Gma: So what did you have for lunch?
Me: Great Harvest
Gma: I thought they just made bread.
Me: They make sandwiches too.
Gma: Do you know what you and all pretty young ladies should eat?
Me: What's that?
Gma: Cod liver oil
Me: Cod?
Gma: It makes you healthy and you'll live forever.
Me: Gross.
Gma: It is delicious. I have some that has mint and it is wonderful.
Me: Mint flavored cod?

Gma: Do you like sushi?
Me: I love sushi. In fact, I had sushi for dinner last night.
Gma: Did you buy it at Costco?
Me: No, I went to a sushi restaurant.
Gma: Costco has good sushi. What was in your sushi?
Me: We had some with tempura shrimp, avocado, eel...
Gma: Eel?
Me: Yes. Eel.
Gma: Ew...I could never eat eel.
Me: You'll eat mint flavored cod but you won't try eel?

Gma: So I heard you were teaching piano students.
Me: Yes, I'm teaching my mom's while she's away.
Gma: I didn't think you were qualified to teach piano lessons.
Me: Really.
Gma: I've heard you play a little at my house but that's it.
Me: I'm actually a pretty good pianist.
Gma: Well do you know who gets my piano when I die?
Me: Carter.
Gma: Don't you think that's the right decision?
Me: You can do whatever you want with your piano Grandma.

Gma: How is your Dad?
Me: I haven't talked to him in awhile.
Gma: Well Suzi talked to him yesterday.
Me: Then Suzi probably knows how he is.