Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Get Over Yourself

The letter I wish I could send:

Dear _________,

I received your print-out of the online application you attempted to submit for our annual art competition. I wish to address your hand-written accusation next to the field requiring your email address which read as follows:

“Requiring an artist citizen to have a computer and/or maintain an email account could be construed as a financial discriminatory act by the State of Utah against its citizens. **contact me by phone or letter via USPS as my computer is dysfunctional at this time.”

I find it hard to appreciate your concern when you seemed to have no trouble finding a computer to fill out this application in the first place. I’m sorry your internet failed and you were unable to complete the submission process. Because you chose to submit via our online process (as opposed to the mail-in process), we require an email address to send you a confirmation. You provided your email address, which I’m familiar with, as you and I have exchanged emails in the past.

The assumption is that most people who own a computer maintain an email address. I can appreciate the fact that many people (including artists) do not own a computer because of financial reasons or by personal choice. Those who don’t own computers typically have free access through public libraries and/or other associations. If you don’t have that access, we provide a computer in our office for our patrons to use.

As I mentioned earlier, we do have other forms of application that don’t require an electronic process. Our constituents are welcome to fill those out by hand, and those forms do not require an email address.

Although I admire your attempt to defend the financial rights of Utah’s citizens, I’m confused at your claim that we discriminate against “artist citizens” by requiring an email address. The online form also requires a street address and a phone number. According to your logic, expecting artists to pay a mortgage/rent not to mention a monthly phone bill would be discriminatory as well. If you were actually unable to pay a phone bill, computerless and homeless, I might take your accusation more seriously.

Oh, and your implication that artists have a special financial burden imposed upon them is both short-sighted and stale.

Thank you for your submission and good luck in the competition.


Jaime said...

That is one of the best "your an idiot" letters I've read in awhile! Do you ever outsource these mad skills you posses?

Saule Cogneur said...


Laura Lee said...

Sure Jaime. Especially if you catch me on a day when I'm hungry and sleep-deprived.

Kristi said...

I really think I could use your skills as well. There are a few parents/administrators/regular people I see around town I'd like to send letters to.

SRA said...

Ha! Zing!

Maria said...

You really should send it.

Cameron's Corner said...

Do all these "artists" have entitlement issues like this?

Alex said...

Go get 'em Laura. I totally wish I could send things like this to a couple of people. That's pretty funny that they printed the online form out! Haha.

Ilene said...

Perhaps such a complaint will act as justification when their art piece does not get selected; they can blame such a result on the discriminatory practices of the UAC on its artist/citizens rather than on their lack of artistic skills.