Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Temple Lights Tour


This year has gone by so fast. I can't believe it was time again for the ward's annual Christmas Lights tour on temple square. I remember it being colder last year, although last night was pretty cold too. But last night was definitely the most entertaining.

Our bishop led the tour. Is he an official tour guide? No. And the temple square workers don't like that one bit. But he was wearing a suit and yelling at the top of his lungs so he drew a crowd. And he is very knowledgeable when it comes to church history and symbolism and everything, but I felt bad for the people who latched onto us, because they didn't understand that only half of the things that come out of JP's mouth are true.

The Bishop mentioned he got kicked out of Temple Square before. I thought he was just joking, but after last night I believe it. He kept asking us to keep our eyes out for anyone that “looks serious.” He did manage to get us kicked out of the Visitors Center for giving an unauthorized tour. A nice missionary couple politely watched him for awhile until they interrupted him, shook his hand and asked that we speak to a sister missionary so we can learn a few things. The Bishop said he knows where they are outside and he'll take us to them. But instead he took us to the Museum of Church History and Art. Fortunately a girl in our ward is an official employee of the Museum so she ran ahead and warned them that we were coming.

As we left Temple Square the Bishop turned around and said, “Wasn't that great?! Can you believe we made it out of there? Seriously the fact that we made it out of there is a miracle – considering all the cameras they have on us. And the misinformation.”

Not to mention the laser pointer. He had the laser pointer on the temple showing us the “pilasters” and the sunstones and moonstones and which rooms were which. I mean, it could have easily been mistaken as a sniper.

My two favorite things I learned that aren't true:

1.The columns in the temple are hollow because they wanted to fill them with methane gas so there could be torches at the top that burned 24/7

2.When the Bishop was climbing up the temple for a documentary film, a man opened up one of the windows and started throwing out cyanide for the pigeons. And they had to time it just right so the pigeons wouldn't immediately fall down dead in the bushes, but have enough time to fly away and die somewhere else.

As we walked to Paul's for hot chocolate afterwards, we passed the Bishop's house on West Temple. Bishop glanced over at his house and said, “The guy who lives there is crazy.”

6 comments:

Hilda said...

Wow, I'm bummed I missed such a great tour. But I sure am glad that you made it out of there ok.

P.S. I hear you're a gamer...

Kev N' Kate said...

Lar, that was a serious laugh! This guy sounds like a gem. Man, good story... and I must say, you are always good at telling them. Are he and your dad friends? It reminds me a few vacations with Uncle Tom. :)

Ilene said...

They definitely didn't teach me those fun facts when I took that temples class. If they had, I probably would have earned an 'A.' I'm good at remembering misinformation.

ThomCarter said...

Holy crud. Your ward seems awesome!

Ang said...

Laura, who is your bishop?!! He must have been in my home ward if he lives on West Capitol...

cyn the win said...

Ok Laura.. I guess I'm stalking your blog. This post is hilarious. I love colorful people your B who make up information. I always say a little embellishment makes every story better, but this is beyond that. Great post. So unique. No wonder you and Ilene are friends.